Keeping your standards high and making the love last might sound like two opposing ideas, especially if you’ve endured a long-term marriage and/or had children as a result of that relationship. Whether you’re married or divorced, whether you’re parents or not, widowed or single, it’s important to remember what you want and deserves from a relationship, and to understand what needs to be done in order to obtain them.
All of these things are important to consider, whether you are trying to improve your current relationship or find a new love that will truly last. Below you will find 10 easy ways to keep your standards high and maintain a lasting relationship.
1. Love yourself first.
As cliché as this is, it’s still so very true. You cannot expect to sustain a functional, happy relationship with another person if you do not have a loving relationship with yourself.
If you do not respect and appreciate yourself, your standards are bound to be too low, which will most likely lead you, unless it has already led you, into the wrong relationship. What are your standards? What do you expect from your partner? Does your husband or wife still fulfil those needs?
2. Don’t lose yourself.
Another reason why it’s so important to love yourself, not only for the benefit of your own self-esteem but because confidence is often what attracts our partners to us. When we lose that light about ourselves, the spark in our relationship often follows suit. Don’t desert the parts of yourself that made your partner fall in love with you, because those are probably the same parts that you once loved about yourself.
And if you’re unhappy with the person you’ve become, you’re bound to be unhappy in your relationship.
3. Be realistic.
Nobody is perfect but, if you choose wisely or have already chosen wisely enough, your partner will be pretty darn close. Still, it’s important to be realistic, whether this is in regards to your husband or wife, your mother-in-law or father-in-law, or your children.
4. Put in the work.
When you have impractical expectations, you will find yourself being let down, again and again. If you’re the kind of person to react upon this disappointment, you may find yourself constantly starting over and never actually settling down. Remember, lasting relationships require work. Why do you think we call marriage a commitment?